Saturday, April 18, 2009

Hogan the Bardbarian


Flipping through some old Dragon mags I found this illo from issue #107. I've seen this illo a bazillion times before, since I got the issue when it came out in 1985. But today it struck me what a fun idea it would be to play a bard based upon Hulk Hogan. As I recall in 3.5 a bard can define his or her Perform skill as pretty much anything the DM will tolerate. So Hogan the Barbarian would be a high Strength, high Charisma bard with Perform (battle theatrics). You could let all the fighters do the hard work and try to steal all the glory for it. But for putting up with your antics they get all the usual benefits of bardish buffing.

12 comments:

  1. Hulk Hogan as a Bard?
    This made me remember something I had tried to forget. There is an album my friend has that has to be heard to be believed: Hulk Rules

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  2. I love it.

    Then you can add in a rival party, and give them a bardbarian too -- based on "Rowdy" Roddy Piper.

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  3. Anonymous1:56 PM

    I HAVE ALWAYS TRY TO FIND WAYS TO MAKE WRESLING A PART OF MY D AND D GAMES, BUT THIS IS BYF AR THE COOLEST!!!!1 BUT I DONT THINK THEIR IS ANYWAY THAT HOGAN THE BARDBARDIAN WOULD JUST SIT BY AND WATCH OTHERS DO THE BUTTKICKIN- HE'D WOULD BE IN THE MIDDLE OF IT HIMSELF.!!!

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  4. Ok, yes, wrestlers are imperfect human beings.

    But I think the original idea works because it's not weighed down with irony or snark. Now, maybe I just think that because I grew up on wrestling. And yes, my Hulk Hogan will always be the Hulk Hogan of the 80s. But it seems to me that that's exactly the Hulk Hogan that makes this idea the most fun.

    (Well, ok, you could also give him an evil twin bard who has sold out and gone Hollywood. That would work for me, too.)

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  5. Anonymous2:08 PM

    Awesome.

    Does he lose XP after his inevitable alignment change during the New World Order years?

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  6. You could let all the fighters do the hard work and try to steal all the glory for it. But for putting up with your antics they get all the usual benefits of bardish buffing.Sounds like an officer in general ;)

    No I like the idea of a military tradition where the troops are led by 'bards' who know a lot about marching and speeches and managing morale and keeping stuff polished, but leave the real killing to the fighters.

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  7. I know this is meant to be tongue-in-cheek, but if you're serious about developing it as a concept it couldn't be easier in 3.5e. Three obvious options immediately spring to mind:

    - Multiclass barbarian/bard. You can do this with the core rules.

    - If you want to stretch to using 'Unearthed Arcana' there's the Savage Bard variant. Bit less magical, illiterate, a bit more combat focus.

    - If you want to go as far as using 'Races of Faerun' there's the Warrior Skald prestige class which is absolutely ideal. Best way to qualify: 1 level of Human Paragon from Unearthed Arcana (for Adaptive Learning - lets you take one skill and designate it to always be a class skill - so choose Perform), then five levels of Barbarian popping ranks in Perform all the way. Take Power Attack and Cleave along the way to qualify (though personally as a referee I'd let you take more bardically-inclined feats such as Skill Focus(Perform) instead - it makes more sense). Then at 7th you enter the Warrior Skald class.

    Two great things about Warrior Skald for this character. First, *no spells*. After all, why should everyone who's good at inspiring people through performance also be able to summon celestial badgers and create water out of thin air? Second, the Warrior Skald's special bardic abilities are all to do with inspiring allies and demoralising foes.

    So, that would be my Hogan the Bardbarian.

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  8. Perform (Smack-Talk)!

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  9. ligedog3:19 PM

    I've rolled up a couple of professional wrestlers using Mongoose Traveller using the Entertainer career. I think one of them actually picked up real combat skills but only after serving a couple of more terms as a bodyguard (enforcer).

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  10. You won't think it's so funny when Hulkster the Barbarian cuts up his wife and her 19 year old boyfriend with that sword, BROTHER!!!

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  11. Anonymous8:29 AM

    I know 4e is badwrongfun, but Wizards has something for this type of character. The Inspiring Warlord and Bravura Warlord could both be used essentially without modification for this purpose.

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