Wednesday, August 17, 2016

You, the universe, or both have gone very wrong

Why did you become an adventurer? (d30)

  1. Early one morning you saw the sky crack, then break, revealing strange worlds behind the sky.  You haven't been able to live an ordinary life ever since.
  2. You came home one day and the sister you buried a year prior was alive and well.  No one else in the family remembers her illness or death, yet her tombstone still stands in a nearby graveyard.
  3. You used to work as a computer technician in a futuristic domed city, but woke up one morning the idiot child of the village blacksmith.
  4. One day the bucket of the village well brought up blood instead of water.  No one else seemed to mind, but you sure as hell did.
  5. After the eclipse everyone else spoke a different language.  You're pretty sure the folks back home thought you'd been possessed by a babbling demon.  You've only now just picked up the basics of your new native tongue.
  6. Returning from a visit to a distant kinsman, an ancient forest covers the exact spot your village used to occupy.  You turned around and the trail you followed was gone.
  7. You were caught up in a war between shadowy angels and titanic metal gods.  At the final battle you took a blow to the head.  When you came to you were still on the same charred and bloodstained field, but everyone and everything else was gone.  None of the locals remember the war or its combatants, yet you have a dozen scars from it.
  8. One night you came home after a long day in the fields.  The womenfolk wailed and the menfolk cowered.  Your own brother drove you out of the house with a cleaver in one hand and a holy symbol in the other.  Later you found your own gravestone.  According to it, you've been dead 3 years.
  9. You worked up the nerve to ask the elder of the clan what had happened to the shadows.  Why were they no longer a luminous rainbow glow, but instead dark and spooky?  Without answering, he had you driven out of the community.
  10. On the day after midsummer everyone you knew started calling you by a different name, as if it had always been your own.  They also began blaming you for a wide variety of petty crimes.  Then you realized your face had changed as well.  Who are you?
  11. You used to live by the sea until one night a brass galleon with a skeletal crew slid into the harbor.  A skeleton prince wearing a flaming crown blew a silent note on a bronze horn.  Everyone in your village marched aboard the galleon, as if in a daze.  It sailed away, leaving you alone forever.
  12. In all your dull life you never expected to see an aerial battle right above your village.  Dragons and demons and flying ships exchanged strange fires and multi-colored lightning.  One of the dragons fell.  Only then did you realize how far up and how huge the combatants were.  The dying dragon crushed everyone and everything you ever cared about.
  13. You used to be a dog.  Slightly smarter than most dogs, but just a dog.  Your young owner treated you cruelly.  Then one day you and your owner swapped bodies for no discernible reason.  The dog ran away--no doubt fearing revenge--but you had to run too because you couldn't successfully imitate your former owner.
  14. One day you awoke in a mass grave.  It was only after you climbed out of a pile of rotting corpses that you realized you had no idea who you were or how you got there.
  15. No one else back home can see the hole in the sky or the baleful gaze of the hideous cosmic beast that watches us through it.  You couldn't work in the open fields any more, knowing it was always looking over your shoulder.  You had to flee.  It still watches.
  16. You used to be the whole universe, one vast ecstatic cosmic consciousness.  But then more and more of your all-body became numb and alienated.  Now you're just this tiny lump of ambulatory meat and you don't know what  happened or why.
  17. You don't know on what strange battlefield it received its wounds or whether it was a giant or a god or something else, but it stumbled into the village green and promptly died.  Everyone else in the village entered into some weird frenzy, gleefully tearing the corpse apart and devouring it raw.  As you fled in horror they started to change into unhuman things.
  18. Twice a year every year you had taken the old ferry, for as long as you could remember.  This time when you reached the far bank of the river it was a totally different place.  You turned around and the ferry was gone.  So was the river.
  19. You used to be a professional circus freak, the Hideous One-Headed Four-Limbed Abomination.  Then one day the sky flashed a weird color and suddenly everyone else was deformed just like you.  The poor bastards don't even remember their former three-headed, six-limbed glory.  You're not a freak anymore, but you're out of a job and still kinda feel like one.
  20. One day you started growing at a prodigious rate--or perhaps everything else shrunk--until your head cracked open the sky.  You grew and grew until you were normal size in a much bigger universe outside your old one.
  21. You were born with a special gift: You can dimly remember your past and future lives, as if your consciousness were a tangled thread in the weave of time.  People back home thought you were a witch.  Maybe they're right, but the whole burning-at-the-stake thing they tried was still super rude.
  22. One day the earth shook and the land shifted.  Your home and all your kin sunk beneath the waves, which was surprising seeing as how you lived a hundred leagues from the sea.  You'd have drowned, too, if not for that log you clung to.
  23. One day cracks opened in the sky.  You suddenly fell upwards and landed someplace else.
  24. One day you noticed an extra door in your home.  From the darkness beyond a gnarled green hand beckoned.  You're still not sure why you followed or who that goblin was.
  25. You used to be an astronaut.  Your single seat orbital spacecraft passed through a strange energy field and you lost all contact with mission control.  You splashed down in a world that doesn't seem to be Earth.
  26. The block of ice you were frozen in thawed out.  Apparently your home civilization has been gone for a whole ice age.
  27. Back in the day you were a glorious 7-dimensional hyperbeing.  Then the war in heaven came.  An omega angel wielding a meson blade sliced off a 3-dimensional appendage, which fell down to ordinary spacetime.  You may look like an normal person, but you're really a living amputation in a fallen world.
  28. The glowing blue rain turned everyone else in your home village into hideous snake people.  They told you they still loved you, even though you're now the local freak.  But you couldn't cope and fled.
  29. You were a footsoldier in the last of the Psychic Wars, but an Oblivion Bomb has scrambled most of your memories of the conflict.  Your not even sure how you ended up on this particular planet.
  30. You used to be a god.  Your whole pantheon fought in Ragnarockaggedon, but your side lost.  To escape the Cosmic Regulators and the inevitable trial for Crimes against Divinity, you dispersed your god-power and implanted your essence into a mortal body.