A tale of tragedies in Cornwall today.
Somewhere just off the spiral stairs below the south tower the party was ambushed by one of those big metallic spiders. The hopeless loser Robert proved the inadvertent hero of the moment. His death and apparent tastiness bought the rest of the party sufficient time to escape.
The dwarf Harry Jasso attempted a parlay with a trio of Vile Man-Bats. The reaction roll came up as the worst possible result, not even accounting for Harry's abysmal charisma, so I ruled they mistook him for one of the mad gnomes. A sonic screech attack threw him back 30' into a wall, doing twice the damage necessary to kill him. The rest of the party bravely hid in an adjacent room until the Vile Man-Bats departed. To their credit, they did bring back the pulped remains of his body for proper burial at the abbey.
Samson Jones! got a little out of hand in his carousing and somehow ended up in some sort of brawl with what he thought was a transvestite hitting on him. Turns out it was actually Lady Susan's somewhat mannish looking older sister, the widow Chezmerelda. Now Samson Jones! is rotting in the dungeon of Castle Bouttreaux with a long list of charges against him (slapping a noblewoman, operating a lizard without a license, aggravated mopery, etc.). The bribes and fines necessary to get him free total a whopping 6,000 gold pieces. Who will take care of his sons, who are hideously deformed and hideously stupid respectively? Don't let the cops know, but Uggs the Cleric is organizing a jailbreak. Hit up +Reynaldo Madrinan on G+ if you want in on the action.