Friday, May 28, 2010

damnedest dream I've had in a while

So I was at this high tone party in a refurbished brownstone.  It was the kind of upscale affair where celebrities were all over the place.  I distinctly remember the fashion wonk from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy sitting on the kitchen counter surrounded by a rapt audience of party-goers, expounding on his opinion that the brioche did not go with the wine.  Which is pretty weird, since after I woke up I had to go to Wikipedia to look up exactly what the hell brioche is.  Turns out it's bread.

Remember Pat Stevens?  She was a talk show hostess that Nora Dunn played on Saturday Night Live a few times in the eighties.  I always liked Nora Dunn.  Anyway, Pat Stevens walks up to me holding a frou-frou cocktail with an umbrella and starts gushing about all the wonderful people at the party, rattling off a long list of names.  I've never heard of any of these people, so I nod politely.

All of sudden these french doors fly open and in march this bunch of Hell's Angels, moving in diamond formation like the secret service use when surrounding the president.  And who is standing in the center of the formation?

The President of Heavy Metal, apparently.

I yell "Ronnie!  Aren't you dead?!" and he replies "I'm Dio, baby!  Dead don't matter to me!"  He then hands me this bar of silvery metal, maybe four inches across, eight or nine inches long, with a thickness of less than half an inch.  Inscribed on one side are Egyptian hieroglyphics in three colums, with these pre-Columbian glyphs done in relief in the spaces between the columns.  Kind of like this:


So I ask Dio what this is all about and he just smiles and says "Figure it out!"  That's when I woke up.