must-miss D&D

Every two weeks I try to send an email reminder to my players noting that today is a game day. Here's what I sent them just a few minutes ago:

In tonight's very special episode Angus sits down with his father over coffee for a heart-to-heart talk, while Darwane meets the girl of his dreams while volunteering at a homeless shelter. Meanwhile Gregor Guntherson trains hard for the upcoming rollerderby competition. Will he be able to overcome his fear of rollerskates and win the big game? Or will the greedy land developers bulldoze the family roller rink?

Sometimes I like messing with my players' heads. What's really on tap tonight at my game table? Three words: GIANT FUCKING SPIDERS.