Five Things I Learned This Weekend

• TNA wrestler Lance Hoyt can stand on the turnbuckle and leap all the way to the far side of the ring just to kick you in the face.
• David Hasslehoff hates jugglers.
• "Flushable" baby-wipes aren't. (This item I learned from the guy who unplugged my sewer line Sunday morning.)
• My sister keeps her house locked up tight, but then leaves her car unlocked with the garage door opener in it.
• Conan the Barbarian likes blueberries.