16 oz. club soda (chilled)
Heaping tablespoon beef bullion (sodium-less)
One teaspoon steak sauce powder (the kind you mix yourself)
Dash of onion salt
Dash of tabasco
Mix ingredients in a cup that can hold 16 oz, one tablespoon, one teaspoon, and two dashes. Drink.
(Meeting interesting people like Almafeta is one of the reasons I love RPG.net so much.)