When last we left our genetically impaired heroes they had decided to build a new bridge to replace the one they accidentally blew up. So we started this week's session at the next logical step in the narrative: an attack by hostile mutant tree sloths. The logging team recruited by the party tried to chop down the lair of a family of gamma sloths, only to be treated to radioactive eyebeam attacks. The sloth morale broke early and the encounter was brief, but I was entertained because these infamously slow creatures kept winning the initiative roll. Gamma sloths have a low AC and are immune to radiation, so I announced their fur must be shiny and metallic. Joe latched onto this fact and decided that his lich's biker jacket needed a fur lining. Have I mentioned that my players are rad to the max?
The next little hassle in bridge construction was a wandering monster. Instead of rolling up a critter as is my usual wont, I just opened my copy of Labyrinth Lord to a random page. My eyes immediately fell on the entry for crab spiders. I've always felt that crab spiders should have big crab claws, so I added a couple d6 damage attacks with grab ability. And just for good measure I added some wasp wings, allowing it to swoop down and attempt to carry off Spunky the Invincible Wonder Weasel. Also, I arbitrarily gave the spider 9 more hit dice than are in the book. Sometimes I'm a dick that way. Spunky ended up finishing the fight trapped in a spider claw, repeatedly bashing the thing in the face with her sledgehammer.
The last major hurdle in building the new bridge was the Sludge River itself. Periodically slimes, oozes, jellies and puddies float down the river and at least some of them would readily eat the the logs. I thought the PCs would travel upriver to locate and shut down the source of the pollution, but instead they covered the logs with pitch. Although I had this neat side jaunt in mind, I decided that I liked this idea. They got to have their bridge and I got to keep sending oozes down the hexmap. Win-win.
At the grand opening of the bridge I assigned a flat 1 in 6 chance that their would be a catastrophic design flaw, but the structure held firm. The nearby fishing village feted the party for re-opening the old trade route to the city far to the west and I awarded the PCs 200xp each for doing their part to make the world a little more civilized. The next day the party set out on their quest: to find the wizard's tower to the west. Actually, I'm not sure they really want to find the wizard. The lich just wants the dude's spell books.
Well, my daughter is begging me to come watch Futurama with her, so the second half of this recap will have to wait. I can hardly say no to that! Stay awesome, everybody.
Ultimate Ulverland Unleashed!
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