This is a modern replica of a 12th century 'bar' style mace fished out of the Thames.
Mince Pie Fest 2024: Waitrose No 1
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These often get picked as the best supermarket mince pies by the gutter
press, so let's see. The pastry has a good texture, firm but also soft, but
is mayb...
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...that. is. awesome. Next time I get the chance to play a cleric, that's why my character is going to use!
ReplyDeleteFriggin' autocorrect. I meant "that's WHAT my character is going to use!"
DeleteYeah, no way that thing's going to spill blood. ;-)
ReplyDeleteMace review:
ReplyDeletehttp://sbgswordforum.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=otherweaponreviews&action=display&thread=3850
However, I'm calling BS on its supposed existence 'all across europe' - the only sources I can find for this mace are resellers of the modern type.
"Mace review" - possibly the best turn of phrase I have read all week.
Delete"A+++. Would crush skulls with again."
Ha ha. "I canz crush skullz now?"
DeleteReminds me of the "Rome" TV series. Some brutal urban fight scenes.
ReplyDeleteAnybody read Gene Wolfe's Wizard-Knight books? Before Abel becomes a knight he uses something much like this that he calls "Swordbreaker". True story.
ReplyDeleteThis came to my mind as well.
DeleteYup, I'm reading it now and this was the first thing I thought of.
Delete"But only when he arrived at the Great Gate of the Giants and found it held in place by Phillips screws did he realize the destiny the gods had put in his hands."
ReplyDeleteseriously. I think I'm gonna hand out one of these just because of this idea.
DeleteI want one. I will call it my hate stick. I can't think of a single good use for that other than splitting melons.
ReplyDeleteOn sale for only $120! http://www.darkknightarmoury.com/p-3345-bar-mace.aspx
ReplyDeleteIf my character had one, he would name it "Mister Swat."
ReplyDeleteeeeeyeah. I can totally see the distinction between that and "edged weapons."
ReplyDeleteIt does look awesome though, and I'm stealing the philips screwdriver idea. Next: weapons based on bradawls and corkscrews. Maybe an arrow.
The dreadful Bar Mace progression was a series of oneupmanships beginning with James Bar of England, c. 1150, who designed a Bar Mace with a double-axis (the "X"). His cousin and tormentor Phillip Acerix designed an upgrade with three axes (the "*" or "Asterisk" lent its name to the typographical symbol which shared its shape and came into use thereabout at roughly the same time).
ReplyDeleteJames Bar, being ill-inlined to surrender to Phillip's superior macery, developed the four-axis Bar Mace after significant time and effort, around 1171, and slew Phillip with it. Unbeknownst to him a twelve-axis model was then in use in northern France and throughout Portugal.
These advancements continued until a severe stall at twenty-five axes, beyond which metallurgical science would not allow progress until 1901. Thomas Edison experimented with an electrified sixteen-axis Bar Mace with a rubberized handle. This device was used to simultaneously bludgeon and electrocute giraffes, as simply electrocuting elephants was no longer "stunning" for onlookers.
1990 saw an interesting discovery at CERN, where scientists discovered that the elusive B Boson (nicknamed "Shy Jenny") was in fact shaped like Phillip Acerix's three-axis Bar Mace. The nickname was doubly appropriate as Jenny Acerik was the woman over whom the two men fought when they weren't fighting over mace design (cousin to them both, in fact, though Wikipedia refuses to allow this completely true biographical fact in their respective entries. An editorial prudishness I believe).
The legacy of the Bar Mace continues even today, in the design of nanite factory turnstiles, explosive bolts on space vehicles, and nozzles for deep-sea welding torches. The impact probe slated for launch in 2021 by NASA intended to pierce Europa's crust and search for life in its frigid waters is a fractal recursion of James Bar's original two-axis design.
Well, now I know the rest of the story.
DeleteThere are a lot of geometric style mace designs. Especially among the Russians. I have just received some large hex nuts that I plan on using in a heavy mace. Very large hex nuts, they weigh 1.5 pounds a piece. Still playing with how I want to attach them to the shaft. Don't buy a replica mace. Make your own.
ReplyDeleteAh, "Bar Mace" comes from James Bar... I thought it might be what the bartender kept under the counter in those seedy Southwark taverns on the "wrong" side of the Thames.
ReplyDeleteDefinately making an appearance in my post apoc LL conversion. I like the "sword shattering" ability idea too...
ReplyDeleteThe use of the mace by churchmen to avoid "spilling blood" is generally considered these days to be a myth. there's no direct eveidence for it. Bishop Odo of Bayeux who is depicted in the Bayeux Tapestry is probably shown wielding a mace as a symbol of office or power. - Everyone in the tapestry shown with a macs is a leader of some sort.
ReplyDeleteMedieval weapons were invented/designed to tackle specific types of armour. Maces were popular as weapons because they were effective against mail armour; breaking bones and doing bludgeoning damage. They were part of the medieval weapons arms race.
Sorry if this is a bit dry but I thought it might be interesting :)
Less well-known is that Bishop Odo was reputed to be a shapechanger, which is why the Deep Space Nine chief of security was named Odo.
ReplyDeleteI see a lot of references to that as being based on one that was fished out of the Thames, but nothing about the actual mace fished out of the Thames.
ReplyDeleteI *did* find a picture of a mace fished out of the Thames, though. But it isn't shaped like that. Rather than being a continuous crossbar, the cross-shaped part is a head that is at the end of a conventionally-shaped shaft.
If you think about it, having the cross shape continue the length of the mace probably just increases the weight. The middle portion could probably be cut back to a much smaller X shape, without losing much in the way of utility.
My cynical side wonders if this mace is actually a modern product based on a shape that's inexpensive to mass-produce. You could probably extrude cross-shaped steel pretty easily, then it would just be a matter of creating the taper, and wrapping the handle in leather.
Rebar + big metal nut. Put the rebar through the nut so it's in the middle, bend the rebar so the nut can't come off, twist rebar ends together into a handle, wrap handle with cord.
ReplyDeleteOr just buy something heavy at the hardware store. Heck, I bet you could enter any yard sale and create at least six deadly weapons in less than an hour using only what you find there.
I think I just came up with an idea for a History Channel reality show: American Shankers.