Monday, June 28, 2010

Encounter Critical scenario starters (d12)

1.  What if Cobra Commander was trying to conquer outer space?
2.  Remember how near the end of Excalibur ol’ Merlin became a dream ghost?  Somebody really ought to go into the Dreamlands and rescue that guy.
3. What if the galaxy was patrolled by the Justice League of the Federation (Kirk is Superman, Spock is Batman, etc.*)
4.  Re-watch The Wizard of Oz and keep repeating to yourself this mantra: A Primitive Robodroid Pioneer with a War Axe.  Enlightenment will follow.
5.  What if vampires were sort of anti-Kryptonians, i.e. powerless in yellow sunlight but ultra-rad under the rays of a red sun?
6.  Take a romantic comedy/chick flick/etc. and reuse the plot in deadly earnest.  (Example: Steel Magnolias involves a woman who may not survive giving birth to her dynasty’s heir, a rich heiress who spends her money on whatever catches her fancy, a grumpy witch with a giant hound, a crazy woman who makes cakes out of exotic animals, a doxy who finds religion and Tom Skerritt with a gun.  Seriously, you could make a whole friggin’ campaign offa that flick.)
7.  What if black holes were really the feeding orifices of some extradimensional predator?
8.  What if Galactus decided that the Death Star was too big a threat to his food supply?
9.  What if 2010: A Space Odyssey ended with Earth being invaded by giant cannibal space babies?
10.  Samuel L. Jackson survived that fall in Episode III, he’s got a wicked pirate hook hand and he’s organizing the dregs of Coruscant undersociety to kick some Imperial ass.
11.  Three words: Ork-Melmac War.
12.  What if Harry Mudd sold your favorite planet to the Daleks?




*Please forward all photoshops, sketches and cosplay pics of Wonder Woman Uhuru to jrients at gmail dot com.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

ONE ILLAR

Today my family took our weekly visit to the public library.  I was perusing the religion shelves of the nonfiction section when I noticed something.

Came to the religion section seeking enlightenment. Found a dollar instead. Thanks for the mixed messages, universe!
Finding a wayward buck at the end of a shelf full of Buddhism struck me as kinda funny. But then I reach for the bill and see that something's stinky in ol' Denmark.

WTF?
The above image has not been monkeyed with, at least not by me.  Someone scanned in a dollar, edited out the middle of it and printed the results.  Trying to figure out what the butt-heck is going on, I flipped the abbreviated bill over.


Okay, mixing serif and sans serif fonts like that is dubious, but I appreciate the sheer hucksterism, the 50's era Madison Avenue-style 'Burma Shave!' attitude at work here.  Then I noticed something that I sincerely hope was simply an oversight on the part of the artist:

Jesus wept.

Never have the letters T-A-T-E been more sorely missed.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Happy Shatnerday

Best pimp cane since Dolemite.

Friday, June 25, 2010

handy chart, work in progress

Here's a handy chart of where to find each level of the Fight On! megadungeon.


For the life of me I can't find my copy of number 8 right now.  Where the hell did I put it?  Someone with their own copy handy please leave a comment with the name and page number of the level therein.  EDIT: issue 8 info added.  Thanks!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

new Fight On! stuff! huzzah!

There's a sweet new issue of Fight On! now out (pictured right).  Among the articles in this issue is my contribution to the FO! group megadungeon, which will probably end up being the only level of the Darkness Beneath with a 50% chance of Captain America.  Click here to go order a print copy Fight On! issue 9.  Or visit the Fight On! lulu storefront where there are lots of cool specials going on.  For the month of June all back issues are on sale or you can get two limited time hardbound compiliations (featuring issues 1-4 and 5-8 respectively).  Very groovy stuff!

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Shatnerday